$50,000 for getting married? The "price tag" of love presented by AI matching service "Keeper" - Can love be "optimized"?

1. A Place Where People Serious About "Optimizing Love" Gather

The era when love began by chance and momentum is sinking into a sea of swipes and notifications. What is increasing now is not just "meeting" but the idea of reaching "commitment (marriage or long-term relationship)" in the shortest distance possible. Symbolizing this atmosphere is the "Love Symposium" held in San Francisco in November 2025. Tech professionals, app developers, and philosophers gathered in the same venue, treating love and marriage as "improvable challenges." The participation fee was about $200, and lectures, breakout sessions, and short-time matchmaking projects were prepared. febspot.com

One of the organizers reportedly described San Francisco as a "thinky town," where even love becomes a subject of "design" and "verification." febspot.com

2. The Main Attraction is the "Performance-Based" AI Matching "Keeper"

A particularly notable presence at the event was the matching company "Keeper," which uses both AI and human experts. Its most significant feature is the performance-based model called "Marriage Bounty," where the male side pays about $50,000 if it leads to marriage. Additionally, reports explain that men pay $5,000 for each introduced date, part of which is allocated to the final "bounty." Business Insider

And here is the main point. Keeper's application form is long, asking about height, ancestral background, SAT scores, political views, and even facial scans (touching on IQ estimation through facial feature evaluation). If not suitable, it is explained that "constructive feedback" will be returned. febspot.com

It makes sense to target the "pain points" of the love market. Endless interactions on apps without meeting, not matching even when meeting, and feeling exhausted. If so, strengthen the filters from the start and present only highly compatible partners as "elite few"—that is the solution Keeper proposes.

However, the price for this is quite a lot of personal data.

3. "AI Pushes You Forward" "Avatars Seduce"—Proposals Go Beyond Imagination

The ideas discussed at the Love Symposium were not just about "matching accuracy." Tools to predict the outcome of relationships, mechanisms where AI agents "encourage" real-life interactions (approaching/inviting), concepts where avatars seduce on behalf of users, and even ideas to show digitally "aged" future images of partners emerged. febspot.com

In short, the design philosophy is to break down the difficult points of love into "(1) before meeting," "(2) until meeting," "(3) after dating," and "(4) future planning," and place AI in each phase to reduce friction.

Here we realize that love is not only an act of facing the other person but also a continuous process of self-understanding and decision-making. The more AI intervenes, the harder it becomes to maintain the feeling of "deciding for oneself."

4. Why Are People Attracted to "Optimized Love"?

There are at least three realities behind this trend.

• Swipe Fatigue: The more options there are, the harder it is to decide.

• Scarcity of Time: The busier you are, the less you can afford detours.

• Rigid Conditions: There are more conditions that are hard to compromise on, such as values (political views, religion, views on children).

As a result, more people are drawn to the narrative that "love can be designed" rather than "love is fate." Moreover, when "performance-based rewards" are added, the service provider appears serious. "Pay if you can marry" becomes a strong rebuttal to users' distrust ("Isn't the app just trying to keep you using it?"). Business Insider

5. Reactions on Social Media: More "Unease" Than "Expectation"

So how is the public receiving this? The reactions observed around this article generally fall into three categories.

A) "Strong Dystopian Feel" "Eugenics-like"—Caution Towards Ethics

On Bluesky, the article's "atmosphere" is described with a biting metaphor as "something like mixing high concentrations of eugenics with AI," with posts spreading that suggest it takes courage to read. Bluesky Social

The topics of facial scanning and IQ estimation, in particular, tend to elicit sensitive reactions. Everyone knows, on some level, that preferences in love are closely related to discrimination and the reproduction of class.

B) "Such Impossible Conditions Are More Suitable for AI"—Understanding of "Difficult Cases"

Another post on Bluesky lists "conversion desired," "rare condition match," and "political view match at the level of a self-made political party" as examples of "difficult cases" Keeper tackles. Bluesky Social

There is an understanding here that "there is a demand that ordinary matching apps cannot handle." The more special the conditions, the higher the search cost. In that case, the intervention of AI and experts seems reasonable.

C) "Too Expensive" "Suspicious" "Long Questions"—Criticism of Price and Experience

On Reddit, voices of surprise at Keeper's pricing structure ($5,000/$50,000) have been present for some time, with reactions of "too expensive" standing out. Reddit

In recent threads, there are also complaints about the endless questionnaire and poor usability. Reddit

On the other hand, there are posts enjoying the company's "delusion calculator" (a tool that calculates what percentage of the population meets ideal conditions), receiving it as a "game to bring conditions back to reality." Reddit

6. The Real Issue is Not "Accuracy" But "What to Offer"

The topic of AI in love tends to focus on "Does it work? Doesn't it?" But the essence lies elsewhere.

• Privacy: Data submitted for love can become a cross-section of life.

• Bias: Aggregating preferences can easily fix societal prejudices as "specifications."

• Responsibility: When decisions delegated to AI or intermediaries fail, where is the landing point for explanation and acceptance?

And while the performance-based model is powerful, it also risks oversimplifying the goal of "marriage." Just because you can marry doesn't mean you'll be happy, and there is the choice of not marrying even if you are happy. Love should inherently allow for diverse outcomes, but when quantified, it suddenly becomes narrow.

7. How to Engage with "Optimized Love"

What the Love Symposium demonstrated is not a future where love is "replaced" by AI, but a present reality where love is "intervened" by AI. febspot.com

What we should consider is not whether to use AI, but

• which data not to give

• what not to use as "evaluation criteria"

• where to protect human decision-making

These are the three points.

Love is uncertain and painful enough to make you want to optimize it. That's why the "certainty" of AI seems attractive. However, under the name of optimization, what we might give up (chance, detours, learning, dignity) is also part of love.